Change means “to make something different from what it is, or would be if left alone.”

How can you change your life?

We have to do our part, while God does his part. Dwight L. Moody said, “Pray as if everything depends on God, and work as if everything depends on you.” That’s good advice—it captures the balance between the sovereignty of God and personal responsibility.

Avoid the “either/or” fallacy. Rather, it’s “both/and.” God’s part and our part in change are inseparable, like two sides of the same coin.

God’s Part

God’s part is to bring about transformation (a synonym to “change”). Second Corinthians 3:18 says, “And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.”

Yes, we plant and water the corn, but only God can make it grow. Proverbs 16:1, 4 says, “To humans belong the plans of the heart, but for the LORD come the reply of the tongue… The LORD works out everything to its proper end.”

Our Part

Our part is taking personal responsibility. That includes both prayer and participation in the desired change, to not conform to the world any longer but be transformed (changed) (Romans 12:2), and to fully surrender to the Lordship of Jesus Christ.

Here are six practical ideas that can help us change our lives:

1. Start with prayer.

In fact, always pray about everything—it’s God will: “Pray continually…for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus” (1 Thessalonians 5:17-18). Start by inviting God to grant you His favor and the power of the Holy Spirit to change.

2. Do the work.

Recognize you have to add effort to your prayers. James 2:17 famously says, “In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.”

Take action. Not even God can change the direction of a stationary object. Do everything you can to bring about the desired outcome. Anything less is presuming upon God. Here’s my formula:

Prayer without participation = presumption.
Likewise, participation without prayer = presumption.

3. Chip away everything that doesn’t look like Jesus.

Fix your eyes on Jesus—He is the perfect example of a man. Hebrews 12:1–4 says he is not only the author of our faith, but also the perfecter of our faith.

Michelangelo was asked how he was able to sculpt his famous statue of David from a single block of marble. According to the story, he said, “It was easy. I just chipped away everything that didn’t look like David.”

In the same way, we are like large blocks of marble. Bring yourself into the “real presence” of Jesus, the perfecter of your faith, and invite the Holy Spirit to chip away everything that doesn’t look like Jesus.

4. Belief determines behavior.

People do what they want—what they believe. Men change their behavior when they change their beliefs. You will never behave your way out of a situation you have believed your way into.

A man changes his beliefs one at a time, and slowly. Sit under good teaching, and one by one, the spiritual truths you learn and their practical applications will change you into a different man. Listen to sermons, join a small group, do sports and recreation with likeminded men.

Yes, it takes time—it takes a long time to become a disciple. But five or ten years from now you will be so happy. Once you change your mind (what you believe), you will not be satisfied until you also change your behavior, and you have the Spirit to help.

5. Be part of a community.

Most meaningful change takes place in the context of relationships. I’ve been in several long lasting small groups. The beliefs I learned to be true from the Word I became convinced were true when I saw them lived out in my friends. If you are not already in a group, I encourage you to move it to the top of your to do list. I’ll have more to say about church and small groups in this series. If you want to start your own group or you’re looking lessons for your existing group, I can help with both through the Man Alive Community.

6. Lead a fully surrendered life.

Start each day by coming humbly to Jesus and make a full, total, complete surrender of your life to His Lordship. When you do, and no one can do this perfectly, He will show you how to change your life.

The irony of surrender is that it leads not to defeat, but victory.